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The famous Time Magazine cover.
“LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!”
~ A “Tear Eyed” Chris Crocker on Britney [...]
Life is a terminal sexually transmitted disease. Although it cannot be cured, it can be treated with a large dose of death. Thus, the best treatment for life is to ensure that death is administered as soon as possible: one time-tested strategy is leaving the infected baby in a dumpster. This treatment is ineffective; [...]
Number of chicks that Bond has laid since you started reading this article:
Number of chicks dying of Bond’s STD since you started reading this article:
Bond, James Bond 007 (born Ian ‘Bob’ Fleming) is an ultra-suave British secret agent – formerly secret, anyway. Bond is noted for his love of martinis (stirred, not shaken), women (shaken, [...]
Ever wonder what happens if you stick a fork in the outlet? Yearning to find out what electricity tastes like? You’ll learn that much and more if you just stop being such a wimp and stick something in!
Why Should I Do That?
There are several reasons why you should:
Well first off, it’s FUN! What could [...]
Not only does the car need to be crashed…but your stepdad(hereafter referred to as dad) completely deserves this! Here are some simple steps, plus alternate plans, to assure maximum crashedness from your dad’s Corvette.
About Your Dad
Your dad is a regular guy. He works all day, comes home at night. Likes to [...]
Chemistry (the study of dumbing down physics) was first invented by Sir Francis Chemistry, in 1625, along with stockings for men, bikini waxing and the electric centipede. Chemistry derived from the science of cooking. The first modern chemist was Alfred Nobel, whose edible dynamite (an early and futile design) started the whole discipline. Even today, though modern chemistry is considered a branch of alchemy (the science of randomly mixing anything together, like cats and cheese sandwiches, in the vain hope ok making the element of Gold, or even better, the fabled element of Surprise), much of chemistry taught in schools is simply cooking (with explosive cats) and some older text books even refer to the subject as ‘ye olde theoreticale cookinge’. Some experts, however, disagree, as recorded in the famous 847CE publication of Phlogging the Phlogiston, by Marcus Arrhenius Berzelius, famed Stoic and composer of the Classical classic Harold in Italy. These experts argue that, in fact, Chemistry is not about alchemy at all [i.e.; nascent chemistry] at all, but instead, as the French put it, le seul sexe que je vais avoir ce soir. Since it’s French, no one really cares anyway. Chemistry made huge advances when Steven Spielberg noted that movies containing big booms did better in the box office than movies with small booms or none at all. After some initial success along these lines, chemistry became the subject of an unsuccessful hostile takeover bid by Physics. It must be noted, however, that although Chemistry provides far more ways, especially for the amateur truck driver, to blow things up, Physics stuck it in poor Chemistry’s eye with its accomplishments at Hiroshima and Nagasaki……………………………………………….
Life got you down?
Girlfriend left you?
Got banned from your favorite public forum?
Why go on living with the gut wrenching guilt when you can just kill yourself, also known as Suicide. With Suicide, you can just release all that pent up guilt and let your soul go free. Fail anything but don’t fail becoming a hero. Here’s everything that you will need to commit suicide successfully………………………………….
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